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Why Haven't I Found Direction for My Life?

6/8/2017

 
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“How did I get here? I’m 45 and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up!” I hear this sort of statement all the time. 
 
The art of finding your direction AND gaining a sense of satisfaction with your life as it is right now is a process that is unique to each person and is ongoing throughout life. But there are a few strategies that can help along the way.

​Who or what are you following?
We are constantly being influenced by the world around us. Advertisers know how to influence you, even though you think you’re not being influenced! You can read about this here. We're a culture of followers. Instagram, Twitter, Facebook have all made this more evident but we were doing it long before social media arrived on the scene.
Choose to take control of what you let influence you. Pastor Steven Furtick said in a recent message that it’s better to know Who you are following than knowing where you’re going when you're following the One that loves you the most. 
​

Discover who you are, and who you are not
Direction comes from knowing who you are and continually discovering who you were made to be. Gifts, talents, values, likes, dislikes, weaknesses, strengths, resources, circumstances – all of this plays into the discovery process. You were made inherently valuable. Your value comes from the fact that the wisest and most valuable Being in existence thought it was a good idea to make you, exactly how you are, exactly at this time. He made you the way you are to serve a purpose. He gave you certain gifts, and not others, for a reason.
 
Let go of the illusion of certainty
Some of us have a greater tolerance for uncertainty than others. Some people long for supernatural revelation so that they just know that they’re on the right track. Others are OK winging anything that comes their way. For those that get stuck desiring certainty, you may need to wrestle with the fact that there might not be one specific direction.  
 
Let go of the fear that keeps you trapped in indecision
God gives us permission to be co-creators with him in our destiny. I can picture some of you looking back at me with immense fear in your eyes, “that sounds like so much responsibility!” Yes AND remember that God is a part of your equation if you are trusting him with your life. He’s a good father, he made you, he wants good things for you, he cleans you up when you make a mess, he heals your broken spots and he takes back situations that were bad and makes good out of them. He wants to use you where you are right now. With a God like that, you can trust him as you take a step forward. God can use any path you choose if you are honestly trying to follow his way of life and trusting him to use you.
 
Know when to follow your gut and when not to
 “Follow your gut” is a common piece of wisdom and it can serve a great purpose, but what do you do when your gut gets confused, torn between two options? Your feelings will always change and it’s not always wise to use them to guide you. If your feelings are constantly in tension with one another, you may have an underlying fear that needs to be addressed. So what do you use to make a decision if your emotions are always changing? You can use your logic and you can orient toward your priorities and values. But even these things change over time. So for me, the one thing that doesn’t ever change in my constantly changing world is God. Anchor yourself to the One that does not change, who sees it all and has the big picture for your life. Ask him to inform you. Here’s a great podcast about how to do that.
 
Practice contentedness and gratitude
Satisfied people have recognized that there were many different directions they could have taken but have learned not to look back, not to compare with others and not to second-guess. In essence they have decided to celebrate what they have been given.
 

Finding direction in life is usually a process and it typically looks different than we expected. Know that you are not alone. You have so much value to bring to the world and there is a kind leader waiting for you to ask him for direction.
 


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    Hello and welcome! I'm Karin, I'm a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor with a private practice in New Brighton, MN serving the Twin Cities metro area, St. Paul and Minneapolis. I specialize in helping struggling kids and overwhelmed adults find relief and live a vibrant life.

    I'm a step-mom to two awesome kids, wife of a high school math teacher/saint, outdoor enthusiast, follower of Jesus, INFJ, avid knowledge seeker and fellow journeyer.
     

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  • Home
  • About
    • About Karin
    • Hours & Rates
    • My Approach
  • Services
    • Counseling for Adults
    • Telehealth/Online Sessions
    • Play Therapy for Children
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Events
  • Resources
    • Getting Started
    • Special Areas of Focus
    • Navigating Insurance
    • What is Play Therapy?